By Lance Winslow
It has just been discovered and revealed that France has cheated on its wine crop. How can this be we are told by the French that they have the best wine in the world and yet it has been tested for high levels of testosterone and nobody can figure out why.
Rumor has it that when the French went through a huge drought period.You see, all their vines died and were literally wiped out and they had to be replanted with California seeds and therefore, they have cheated in the world of wine and any taste tests that they had won belong to the United States of America. I cannot believe that the French have cheated so badly and it wasn't until further investigation that we found that they have been doping their crops and using California seeds.
How could France have cheated when they are such a noble and honest group? The Oil for Food Scandal was merely trying to help Saddam Hussein feed his people. You see, the French are the most honest people in the whole world and they would never cheat; old heavens no? Do you find it funny that every time the French lose in sports, business or political posturing that they immediately claim that the other team cheated? Is this the liberal influence that goes on in their country?
Why do they always constantly say that other people are cheating when in fact it is the French that have cheated? We obviously cannot believe anything the French say after the oil for food scandal and after they cheated on their wine crop. Why do we listen to such things? We need to move the Tour de France to the United States. For two reasons; the spectators in the United States will not spit on the riders who are winning and we can build a longer and more challenging course; because it is obviously too easy for American Riders. Consider this in 2006.